Girl, If You’re Looking for Love: STOP!
The 10 Dating Rules I Followed to Manifest True Love
In this post:
The lies we’ve been sold
Before you start dating do this
My 10 Rules for Dating
My love story
List of what to look for in a man and what to avoid
Here’s what I’ve learned about dating and finding love that I wish someone had told me years ago.
Ladies, we’ve been sold a lie. A boldfaced fucking lie, and it’s a big reason why so many of us have been looking for the wrong kind of man. Thanks to fairytales, Disney princess movies, every romantic comedy ever made, and countless other false narratives peddled to us from birth, we’ve been led to believe that love is supposed to be an explosion of romantic feelings. That there should be a “spark” at first interaction. That if he was “the one,” you’d feel love at first sight, or fireworks, or butterflies.
Ladies… that is complete BULLSHIT! That’s NOT an indication of compatibility, love, or even real connection. It’s all fake! It’s often very toxic, and it’s just surface-level bullshit meant to attract the same wrong kind of guy that has never worked for us in the past. Worse, it steers us away from the RIGHT man—the one who is our ideal match.
So, why do we keep falling for it?
Why do women keep telling each other that those things need to be present from the get-go? Why do we keep perpetuating this damaging lie? Why do we tell each other that if you don’t wanna rip his clothes off immediately, you must be settling? What the fuck!? Now that I know the truth about healthy love, I know how insane it is to base our decisions on ridiculous and fleeting surface emotions like that.
But I can’t tell you how many times in the past I fell for those deceptive first indicators and then tried to convince myself that because I had butterflies, or felt a rush when I got a text, or “felt a connection,” or had undeniable “chemistry” that someone I knew was clearly wrong for me was somehow “the one.” Smh. He could have every red flag in the book, could exhibit toxic and narcissistic behaviors, could treat me like shit, and still, I’d tell myself, Welp, I wouldn’t feel this way if it wasn’t meant to be. I just wanna go back in time and give poor, misinformed me a hug and say, Oh girl… that’s not it.
Because we are so focused on those first emotional sparks, no one was telling us what we should be looking for instead.
After finally healing from a toxic, all consuming dating disaster two years ago, I decided to figure this whole dating mess out. I set out to learn what we as women should be looking for instead, how to heal from past relationship traumas, and how to break the cycle of manifesting the WRONG man.